I was kicking it… in juvie – YouTube Dictation Transcript & Vocabulary

1.hey Kelly screw you excuse me that is no way to address a superior oh yeah screw you too whoa what was that all about you forgot her birthday it was yesterday go go ahead you do it okay I insist basically after phis blackmailed Angela Michael asked them to step down from the party planning committee cuz there was too much drama what he said was easy there was a problem with having one head of the party planning committee she becomes too powerful so we appointed two heads party planning this is literally the stupidest thing I've ever done humiliating that's on my side so this is fun my birthday was yesterday and everybody forgot I got really dressed up and excited and no one said a word there wasn't even a party I think sometimes people are really mean to the hot popular girl what's this I reprinted my vendors list for parties it's a list of birthdays half birthdays minutes from past parties and an enemies list you're going to need it if there's some cat stuff mixed in here I'd appreciate you returning it to me of course I wish you two the best of luck thank you Angela Dwight and I would like to say that we'd be honored if you would stay on as a member of the committee and we think you could even run it and take care of everything and we would not get in your way well that is a great idea nice try it's your problem now run it coming in a little hot are we she responds to power you know what why don't you start going through this we just want to say we are very sorry screw you guys you're dead to me if you say screw you one more time screw you be I didn't forget your first never that guys guys we just want to make it up to you what can we do I guess my only wish would be that nothing so terrible would ever happen to anyone else ever again oh God okay in a way it's good that it happened to me because at least I can bear it what kind of cake do you want imbecile ice cream no okay Creed how's it going oh my replacement Bones have been acting up today but hey caline oh so I am collecting $3 from everybody for Kelly's party I'd like to contribute oh great there you go are you kidding well I'm not done yet Dwight this fits in the palm of my hand you haven't blown them up enough why have you chosen Brown and gray balloons they match the carpet what is that it is your birthday period statement a fact not even an exclamation point this is more professional it's not like she discovered a cure for cancer I can't believe how bad this looks are you trying to hurt my feelings because if so you are succeeding fortunately my feelings regenerate at twice the speed of a normal man's okay good then have you collected the money from everyone I am working on it how much do you have $6 that's how much you and I contributed damn it Jim I said I was working on it look I'm at the supermarket and they only have numbered candles how old is she uh 24 37 do you think I'm calling you for your besto I'll call you back I have here Kelly Kapoor's personal and confidential file allow me to share Kelly kapor spent April 1995 to December 1996 at Burks County Youth Center juvie according to past employers it in no way affects her job perform blah blah BL blah what did you do stop yelling at me what did you do I didn't do anything what did you learn in there I bet you learn things huh like how to Fashion a shiv hey what the hell's going on why don't you tell Jim where you were from ages 14 to 15 I was kicking up in juvie what juvie Nile Detention Center where they send teenagers for re got it what did you do huh hey Dwight sounds like she was 14 so maybe we want to go a little easy if she's old enough to get married she's old enough to follow the law what did you do my boyfriend D me so I stole his boat I mean he told me it was his boat it was actually his father's and I just thought it'd be really romantic like the on Louise but with like a boat and it was the worst year of my life and I can't believe that you guys are making me talk about this on my birthday I thought you said yesterday was your birthday you know what I got you a cake you did I want to see the cake and Tada I hate it how do you hate it it's a cake well there's no flowers or toys or I mean there's nothing on it where did you even find a cake like this I mean doesn't have my name on it do you guys know what my name is my name is Kelly right I forgot if there was an e between the L and the why I still don't know I mean I don't even know what the theme is what's the theme bir frosting those aren't themes there's always a theme there's always a theme nice job on the cake Bozo okay you know what next time I'll let you get the cake and I get to scream with the birthday girl okay so all we need is a theme and cups and ice and punch and a cake busy hey what's that show that she's always talking about oh my God is this how you are with Pam cuz she must want to shoot herself in the face you know what I could use a little help you know what I'm a little busy we have a lot to do and you are putting up a very effeminate sign is that what you've been doing it's making a sign fite it's festive you've been making that sign for something that we could just announce to the whole office hey everybody the part's now at 3 I know I just read it on the sign you have to write my suggestions down too I'm not writing horse hunt I don't even know what that means it's in the name okay so far our Ideal Party consists of beer fights to the death cupcakes blood pudding blood touch football mating charades and yes horse hunting you're right forget horse hunting it's stupid look is there a birthday that you remember that you loved here's one it was dark warm wet a sudden burst of light an intense pressure like I'd never felt before father dressed in white pulls me forward mother bites the cord okayy stop forever stop that story that's disgusting and it doesn't count so give me another one shs don't celebrate birthdays idiot it started as a Depression era practicality and then moved on to an awesome tradition that I look forward to every year what about you actually when I was seven my dad took me to the Natural History Museum in New York and we looked at fossils all day and at the end of the day he got me a little plastic Triceratops it was awesome that's cool hey you know what's even cooler than Triceratops every other dinosaur that ever existed didn't see that one coming happy birthday happy birthday hey hey it's not a surprise this doesn't look good what you have a cake you have a delicious cake with your name spelled correctly told you you haven't heard our theme though you don't hear a theme you see it why is there a chicklet on my cake that's the best part that represents a pillow or a television our theme if you will because the fun part is you get to decide on an hour of television or an hour of napping that's our theme cool yeah I love it oh yes okay good so what's it going to be kapor oh can she pick a half hour of each no no oh then pick TV take a nap TV no no no watching TV at work is really cool big nap nothing good is on right now Bonnie H is on you know what I have been watching TV all week I choose nap all right okay nap it is everyone out get out we're going to be eating cake at our desks let's go move it let's go go go go go come on I got this this is for you and happy birthday K thank you okay you've got 1 hour too excited to sleep H great cake nice [Music]