It took me 30+ years to realize what I'll tell you in 10 minutes – YouTube Dictation Transcript & Vocabulary

1.today I will be talking about this one thing that truly changed my life that truly helped me cope you know and better my marriage my my lifestyle and just be more aware of myself this impacted not just my life but my kids' lives and I think it'll continue to impact their children's children's lives so hi friends my name is Jean Marie if you're new here welcome to my Channel today I want to talk about generational curses and blessings there's so many things you can unlock here so a few years ago I came across this influencer on Instagram her name is Lindsay I'm going to link it here she had the session called uncovered Grace and I wasn't able to finish the whole um N9 weeks or seven weeks however many that was but I did go through her exercise on generation I don't know if she called it curses and blessings but that's how I remember it the point is we talk about genetics and things that are hereditary and like things that can be passed on from our parents to us whether that's skin tone height or sickness or you know diseases that can be carried over from one generation to another or even personalities right but what we don't realize and often there are gener generational curses and blessings within our families that we just accept or we just you know it is what it is I'm like this because my mom is like this um and I'm not talking about like medical conditions or physical attributes but really more on how we act how we speak how we behave how we handle things how our relationships are so what am I saying a generation curse could be for example a bad marriage it could be divorce it could be um infidelity it could be even if you're not divorced it could just be like a horrible marriage where you're always fighting and that could be pass on you'll realize if you look around you a lot of times kids that come from divorced parents also end up being divorced themselves or maybe if you trace back their parents also came from a broken family themselves and so my point is these are types of generational curses that we need to identify we need to acknowledge them so we can put a stop to them right another example could be like AB abuse in a marriage right so if a husband is abusive to the wife and children are able to witness this in their daily lives where father is very abusive to the mother and the mother is very timid and shy and does not fight back if you're a daughter or a son witnessing this growing up looking at this it might result to you also being timid and not having a high self-esteem you might not value yourself so much if you're like a daughter growing up in this and you being having that low self-esteem bringing it into your own marriage how does that affect um your husband's reaction towards you or treatment towards you how does that affect your children like your lack of self-esteem will probably also result to your daughters having lack of self-esteem or it could bounce back to a totally different or the opposite result of them being too maybe too prideful like as a way to compensate so my my point is however things are at a certain generation it affects the Next Generation a certain way and we need to be able to identify because sometimes we blame ourselves right like oh I'm like this because I'm just like this I'm so impatient I don't um you know I'm a horrible person blah blah blah but then if you look back at your childhood why are you like this what happened that might have costed and I'm not pointing fingers at our parents you know they did their best right this is really more to understand why things are the way they are why are you like this that way once you understand that you're going to start to open up to a solution of how can I change now that I know the reason why what's my next step as to how to change that for example in my own example in my life I have always been hesitant to receive like I have an issue with receiving either gifts or favors I don't ask people favors as much as possible I try to avoid asking people for favors um I try to I feel very uncomfortable receiving gifts from people or free stuff and I realized this was because growing up my mom was a very like I don't know it was not the easiest childhood but one of the things that my mom would always tell me is that I was ungrateful and so she would always emphasize how ungrateful I was and I realized that resulted to me constantly telling myself at the back of my head whenever she told me this one day I'm not going to ask I'm not going to need you anymore one day I'm not going to need you to take care of me anymore one day I will be able to do it on my own and so because I was always told I was ungrateful I was constantly thinking about that at the back of my head and finally obviously I grew up I'm on my own right I'm able to take care of myself I'm able to take care of my own family but I realized there was this fear of being told I'm ungrateful there was this fear of like oh I don't want to receive anything from somebody because I might do something that might make them think I'm ungrateful after they gave gave me this it's so sad um and I'm so conscious with how I am with my kids to never make them feel that way never make them feel like uh they owe me for taking care and giving them life that's a different conversation but that's something we should never make our kids feel right they're here on this Earth because you brought them here um and it's literally your job to take care of them and I understand they need to be grateful that they're given a good life right but it's not something we want to rub in their faces but that's an example of how I grew up and how that kind of resulted in my adult life and I only noticed and realized that because I was doing this exercise she almost let us write as much as we know and even asked us to interview like this was like years ago so I don't remember much she even asked us to interview relatives if we can and just recall like how was my grandma like how was my grandpa like what about my great-grandfather do you have memories of him just interview like aunts and uncles and your parents on how you know what personalities what hobbies what Memories they have with as much ancestors you can TR back um and then that kind of you know if somebody says oh your great grandpa was an alcoholic or your great grandmother was so nice she was so sweet she was very motherly she would you know things like that let write them down and then you can kind of trace it back to yourself oh like oh my great grandma was like this that's why my grandma was like this and then that's why my dad is like this and then you can kind of Trace down and try your best to see what person personalities or what things in your life connect to any of those identify the good ones the blessings right and and nurture that and make sure you pass that along make sure that doesn't get cut off um make sure your kids continue to receive that blessing and that'll continue within Generations but most importantly identify the curses like what curses do you want to put a stop to make sure that you only pass on the good things to your kids when I discovered this it was like Pandora Fox I realized so many things about myself again I don't want to point fingers like oh I'm like this because my mom's like this my dad's like this no I realized so many things about myself and just be able to explain like oh this is why and it's not my mom's fault it's not my fault that's just the result of certain things that I experience and now that I understand that I can kind of plan on how to change it because the idea of it just being a default like that's just who you are there's no changing that it's gone there was a reason why you're like that and so there's a way to change that right because if you don't understand why you are C you are a certain way or why things are a certain way and you kind of are you're kind of stuck to the idea that that's just how it is it's that's just going to be it is it is how it is understanding why gives you a pathway as to how to change that and I want to share a lot of other things and Nuggets that have helped me in life but I feel like this is really one of the big ones and so I hope you found that helpful my question to you is now that you're thinking about it let me know what ways or what things in your life do you think are are you looking forward to changing or identifying why you're like that like what are things that you want to change moving forward you want to cut off and not pass along to your kids I'm so curious I had a lot of things when I was going through that exercise I'm actually going to link her Instagram here I don't know if she's still doing those sessions I did this like four or five years ago um and honestly that made me understand why I was this way why am I this kind of a wife why do I think this way why is my logic like this like why am I so sensitive so it was amazing and it made me more conscious of how I am because I realized it would affect how my children could be even little things H so hopefully that was helpful curious to hear you know what you find out about yourself let me know in the comments and I hope to see you on the next video [Music]